To improve self esteem one of the things you are going to have to learn to do is look for the gift in every challenge and the opportunities in every crisis. Rather than allowing bad situations to get you down you must empower yourself and instead look for the gift and opportunities in those challenges. You must develop the mindset that every setback is an opportunity for a comeback, otherwise you will allow yourself to get down and depressed.
Very often people run into problems in life, but rather than look for ways to turn things around they bury their head in the sand and hope the problem will just go away, and when the problem doesn’t go away they just accept it and give up and before long their confidence level is ZERO, because they have allowed themselves to accept the mentality of "my life is a not the way I want it to be and there is nothing I can do about it".
I was once on a personal development course with a guy who was suffering from low self esteem because he had been made redundant from work and had been unemployed and on welfare for almost 2 years, he started to accept that he would always be unemployed because he had applied for so many jobs but had been unsuccessful. He felt powerless to change his situation because he had handed over his ability to earn an income to the hands of employers and none of them were willing to hire him.
When we did the Improve self esteem by Flipping Mistakes, Failure and Obstacles exercise on the course, the trainer got him to see that, the reason he had low self esteem and felt powerless was because he was waiting for someone to come and give him a job rather than looking for other opportunities to earn income or maybe retraining in a different field to improve his chances of being employed in a tough economy.
It was a big light bulb moment for him because he realised he was wallowing in self pity and low self esteem for no reason, he realised that he did have the power to change his circumstances and that the power wasn’t in the hand of some employer who was refusing to give him a Job. He discovered how to flip his obstacle in his favour.
To improve self esteem within yourself you must take the same approach. Rather than being down and depressed, empower yourself and look for ways to Flip the situation, look for the opportunities in the crisis and the gift in the problem.
Use the Flipping Your Mistake, Failures and Obstacles worksheet below to help you carry out the exercise.
Flipping Your Mistakes, Failures and Obstacles Worksheet (right click the link and select "Save Link As" or "Save Target As" to download)
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